No you're not here for me. If you were still here for me, you would have been here last night and the night before. This is exactly what I was talking about...you'll be here for me when it's convenient. You don't want to take care of me anymore; I am so sorry that your love has turned into an inconvenience. Remember the talk we had last year, about why I didn't think I'd ever marry? Because I didn't think it would be fair...and you said that you would make that choice to be with me if I would let you. All this time I hated myself for not trusting you or anyone...well thank God! I can't even fathom how much worse this would be if I had believed you. Because, in the end, you were not, are not, will not be here for me...and I would rather bleed than rely on you again. Physical pain is infanitely more preferable to what I felt last night.