I had to take some time off to both clear my head and keep my focus. I knew I had to be absolutely sure before I said this.
I'm moving to L.A. in September, pending my acceptence to MI's Music Business program.
I've been through a lot over the past few years, and especially in the last few months. I finally sat down with Rafe of all people a few weeks ago and talked to him a bit about some of the things that had happened, and he looked at me and said something that I should have seen for myself. Though I shouldn't be surprised...even though we're not that close, he's known me since high school. We were talking about priorities. He said "I'm surprised you've stayed here, being a theatre person, but then again...everything you've done since you've graduated has shown that you'd rather stay here for stability than leave for your dream career." And I'm thinking...
Shit. He is so right.
It's no secret that I first made the decision to stay in this area of Virginia partly because I was intent on keeping my relationship with Lance. When that fell through, I talked myself into staying at the hotel, 'paying my dues' in a sense to give myself some savings and security. I then got into another...stable...relationship with Jacob and a better...stable...job here in town. Then Jacob left, and I met Frankie, and if it hadn't been for external circumstances, I could well be on my way to having a...stable...family, right here in Virginia now.
I've talked to so many people about this, and everyone is so supportive of me to follow this through and go. I thought for awhile that staying here and saving up and getting older would better prepare me, but I'm at the point now where I realize that the longer I stay here the more ensnared I'll become by jobs, relationships, and other priorities.
For the first time in my life, after the hell I've been through these last few months, I feel like I've gained the age and the responsibility, and I can look west and no longer fear that I'm not ready. I know, very soon, on a warm morning in September, I'm going to pack up the few things I think are worth taking with me, and I'm going to drive, drive away from here...
I'll do my best to see every one of you before I go, because I don't think it's likely I'll be back. There's a bit of unfinished business that I want to take care of in person, and things I need to get off my chest before I go. I'm planning on getting together both in Blacksburg and in Roanoke either the end of August or beginning of September to see everyone in town. So plan for drinks sometime around then.
More stories and explanations later...I guess a week offline and I've forgotten how to blog, heh.
EDIT: Yes, I did forget to blog because I forgot the other important thing: I'M GOING TO VANCOUVER TO VISIT FLUFFY STARR! So if you're looking for me from July 28th - August 2nd, I'll be in Canada living like a rockstar. ;-)
I'm moving to L.A. in September, pending my acceptence to MI's Music Business program.
I've been through a lot over the past few years, and especially in the last few months. I finally sat down with Rafe of all people a few weeks ago and talked to him a bit about some of the things that had happened, and he looked at me and said something that I should have seen for myself. Though I shouldn't be surprised...even though we're not that close, he's known me since high school. We were talking about priorities. He said "I'm surprised you've stayed here, being a theatre person, but then again...everything you've done since you've graduated has shown that you'd rather stay here for stability than leave for your dream career." And I'm thinking...
Shit. He is so right.
It's no secret that I first made the decision to stay in this area of Virginia partly because I was intent on keeping my relationship with Lance. When that fell through, I talked myself into staying at the hotel, 'paying my dues' in a sense to give myself some savings and security. I then got into another...stable...relationship with Jacob and a better...stable...job here in town. Then Jacob left, and I met Frankie, and if it hadn't been for external circumstances, I could well be on my way to having a...stable...family, right here in Virginia now.
I've talked to so many people about this, and everyone is so supportive of me to follow this through and go. I thought for awhile that staying here and saving up and getting older would better prepare me, but I'm at the point now where I realize that the longer I stay here the more ensnared I'll become by jobs, relationships, and other priorities.
For the first time in my life, after the hell I've been through these last few months, I feel like I've gained the age and the responsibility, and I can look west and no longer fear that I'm not ready. I know, very soon, on a warm morning in September, I'm going to pack up the few things I think are worth taking with me, and I'm going to drive, drive away from here...
I'll do my best to see every one of you before I go, because I don't think it's likely I'll be back. There's a bit of unfinished business that I want to take care of in person, and things I need to get off my chest before I go. I'm planning on getting together both in Blacksburg and in Roanoke either the end of August or beginning of September to see everyone in town. So plan for drinks sometime around then.
More stories and explanations later...I guess a week offline and I've forgotten how to blog, heh.
EDIT: Yes, I did forget to blog because I forgot the other important thing: I'M GOING TO VANCOUVER TO VISIT FLUFFY STARR! So if you're looking for me from July 28th - August 2nd, I'll be in Canada living like a rockstar. ;-)
 | Song of the Day: Alanis Morissette - "Unprodigal Daughter" www.alanis.com |
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